“scully … scully … i need u to do this thing for me. i can’t do anything by myself except stare broodingly into the distance”
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
“lol scully i kno we’re not working together anymore but can u please do some stuff for me as well as all the work from ur actual job?” — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
“scully ur so stupid for not believing in aliens haha wtf science sucks ok now blow me pls”
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
“scully don’t make me tap my alien poster again.” — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
“scully let’s go visit my friends who sexually harass you so that i can just stand there and laugh and do nothing about it”
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
“scully im so glad u had a good relationship w/ur dad so that i can unload all my daddy issues on u. haha omg i hate girls w/daddy issues.” — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
“scully im going to the cemetery to dig up my sister’s grave again also can i touch ur boob?”
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
“SCULLY UR NOT MY REAL MOM”
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
“haha what? im not watching porn while im on the phone with u scully why would u think that? hey what are u wearing by the way” — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
“scully u need to understand that im in the fbi but the rules dont apply to me bc im special. im like an fbi cowboy & ur a hot saloon owner”
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
“mulder im sending u into this hostage situation dont mention aliens ok?” Mulder to dude holding hostages: “MY SISTER WS ABDUCTED BY ALIENS” — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
Mulder: *breaks all the rules* FBI: ok i guess u can keep ur job why not
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
Mulder: “OMG MOM MAYBE IF U WERENT SUCH A SLUT THEN THE CIGARETTE MAN WOULDNT MAYBE BE MY DAD I WISH I WAS NEVER BORN I HATE YOU” — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
Mulder: yeah babe i work for the government even tho i hate them but like im fucking it up from the inside its called anarchy lol look it up
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
skinner: mulder we need to have a serious conversation *mulder draws a dick on his face* mulder: looooool ur a dick face — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
skinner: no more shenanigans mulder this time i mean it mulder: ur not my real dad u can’t fire me fbi: he’s got u there, skinner
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
skinner: all evidence points to you killing this man. krycek saw u strangle him mulder: lol no it was the government, they poisoned him — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
skinner: can u do one normal case like ur supposed to? mulder *glances at file*: uh it was the butler skinner: great job *arrests butler*
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
mulder: “yeah I’m sad about my sister but like not too sad for a beej. no ones ever that sad, scully.” — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
scully’s mom: scully’s missing im worried mulder *pulls out crucifix necklace” if shes such a skeptic why did she wear this? hmmmmm?
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
mulder: well scully now that u have had cancer and an alien baby i guess it’s time to apologize for not believing me — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
mulder: scully when will u understand that even when things are about u they are still about me
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
mulder: the REAL x-file around here is why no one is touching my wang right now. SCULLY. — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
scully: mulder can u pls take this seriously? mulder: *makes a dad joke* scully: ‘________’
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
scully: i don’t think they’re vampires maybe they just had porphyria it’s this disease where – mulder: I AM FAMILIAR WITH PORPHYRIA SCULLY — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
scully: can i make u breakfast? mulder: um no thanks last night was really great but uh i have a vagina i have to go investigate sorry
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
mulder: scully. don’t make me explain this again. the aliens are GREY not green. omfg do u think this is a joke or something? — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
mulder: um i kno this is kinda weird right now but i swear to god boning me today will make sense once the mytharc is revealed
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
mulder: what are u going to do? shut down the x-files? i’ll just make scully do all my work like every other time u shut us down. dickfaces. — Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) September 4, 2014
